Friday, April 06, 2007

I've got to be more discerning in my MySpace friends, don't I?

So over on MySpace the other day, I got a friend request from the Haley Scarnato Fan Club.

I had no clue who she was. But as I friend just about anybody who isn't a spammer, I said, sure, friend, sign me up.

And that's how I discovered she's on "American Idol."

A show I never watch.

But now, after reading much of New Jersey's beloved Antonella Barba in the paper, I at least figured this Haley girl must have been mentioned somewhere along the way. (We have a pretty darn good TV writer.)

Sure enough, I looked her up, and the consensus appears to be:

1. She's an awful singer.
2. She's got great legs and slutty clothes.
3. She's an awful singer.
4. Reason #2 gets her votes.

I asked the resident "AI" expert at the office (she runs the pool) and sure enough, the consensus was:

1. She's an awful singer.
2. She's got great legs and slutty clothes.
3. She's an awful singer.
4. Reason #2 gets her votes.

Now, thanks to the wonders of YouTube, I've examined some Haley performances.



1. Bad singing? Check.
2. Short skirt thing? Check.



1. Bad singing? Check.
2. Short skirt thing? Check.

You know what, between the long legs, vacant expression and shaky vocals, I'm thinking this girl could be a poor man's Jessica Simpson. And if what I hear about at least one other contestant is true (he/she is the worst one on the show), then my girl's got a shot at the Top 5, and that and the legs ought to be good for a record deal, right?

(Wait a minute... There's already a poor man's Jessica Simpson, isn't there?)

Well, I may have a woman, but I'm still a man. So I'm voting for the girl with the long legs. And my new MySpace friend. Besides, a guy with Becky Baeling's "Becstasy" on his iPod isn't in much position to criticize bad singing.

So I say: Go Haley!

2 Comments:

Freak Magnet said...

Our girl from good ol' MD is gon' kick your girl's ass!! Apparently ours CAN sing.

Jewels said...

LOL @ the Simpson sisters' reference! Personally, I like substance in a singer's voice ;) Can't stand those synthesizer enhanced and embellished voices... The airwaves are swallowed up by vapid entertainers. I want artists, people who sound good in and out of the recording studio...



*jumps off soapbox and merrily skips away* LOL!

Google