Say huh?

Things I never thought I'd hear on a boxing telecast, Part 173, courtesy of Lennox Lewis on "Boxing After Dark" this weekend:

"But what if he falls off the horse?"

When you're done laughing or ratcheting your jaw back shut, read the rest if you want the explanation.

On "BAD's" main event, the "Mexican Cowboy," Jorge Arce, came into the ring riding a horse. A dancing horse.

Yeah, he's jockey-sized (super-flyweight probably belongs on that "list of improbable phrases"), but still. A real, live horse.

Lewis had a point; he was talking, by the way, about the possibility of such an elaborate entrance going wrong and injuring the fighter.

Either you're SWAT or you're not!

I stole this from Norman, the cultural activist.

http://www.myheritage.com

No, of the 10 choices I got to include, not a one was Asian. (Though one was a girl. What's up with that?) But one was a senior citizen and two were from the 19th century. Sigh. I guess I'm getting old.

http://www.myheritage.com

My other photo came out completely different. I think the B/W and the angle threw the computer thing off. But this time, I got an Asian! And a 12-year-old boy. And a bald guy.

And yes, I'm cherry-picking the best results. It's my freakin' face. Deal.

Language arts

So I took this quiz after The Lesley did it, and I got some similar results...

What American accent do you have? Your Result: The Northeast   Judging by how you talk you are probably from north Jersey, New York City, Connecticut or Rhode Island. Chances are, if you are from New York City (and not those other places) people would probably be able to tell if they actually heard you speak.
Philadelphia
The Inland North
The Midland
The South
Boston
The West
North Central
What American accent do you have? Quiz Created on GoToQuiz

Now, before you say, hey, wait a munkee minute, you're from Pennsylvania, and you didn't get Philadelphia, keep in mind...

I'm not from Philadelphia!

Believe me, my uncle's from Philadelphia and it's a whole different accent. I'm from rural Pennsylvania, which is sort of generic Northeast, I guess. And any Jersey/New York influence probably comes from the facts that a) I live in Jersey now; and b) my parents, who taught me to speak, are from New York. Even though neither one has much of a New York accent, depending on whom you ask.

But the survey reminds me of two stories.

First, there was my time with a British accent.

That's right. Once upon a time, I had an accent that most American women find irresistable. (Right, Jin?)

The downside was, of course, that I was about 3 years old.

Unlike a co-worker who tried so hard to lose his Dutch accent as an adult, only to find out that women love foreign accents, this entire thing was unintentional.

My folks had taken me to England, and because children couldn't eat in the dining room at whatever fancy hotel they were staying in, they got a nanny for the dinner hours. And she was, of course, British.

And so I was spending a couple of hours a day with me. While I was learning to talk.

So by the end of the week, my parents noticed that, sure enough, I was starting to sound like her.

Of course, that was all gone a few weeks after we got home. Too bad.

The second story has nothing to do with me, and also happened when I was younger. So maybe I don't remember it 100% accurately, but hey, this is my blog, so you'll just have to trust me.

There was a professor at Bloomsburg, where my Dad taught, who was a linguist.

And my Dad told me once that this professor had solved a missing persons case with his mad linguist skillz.

See, the authorities had found someone wandering with amnesia, and no ID. So they didn't know who she was, and she couldn't tell them.

So they turned to a linguist, this professor. And he talked with her. And by listening to her accent, he figured out what part of the country she was from. (It wasn't anywhere near where they were!)

The cops went to the police in that area, and sure enough, there was a missing person who matched the description of the woman they had.

See? Having an accent can come in handy.

Random historical footnote

Surprise! Today's random historical item isn't about the Civil War.



It's about Alexander Hamilton, first Treasury secretary of the United States, and face of the $10 bill.

I heard on the traffic report the other day, a mention of the Alexander Hamilton Bridge in New York.


So, New York named a bridge after him.

I guess that's what a state names after you when you're educated there, work there and represent it in politics and the military.

New Jersey also has a monument to him.

The Alexander Hamilton Service Area, which I mostly think of because it has a large restroom, the punch line to a rather unfortunate story involving several beers at a party, a long drive home and a two-hour traffic jam near the Queens-Midtown Tunnel.



I guess that's what a state names after you when you're shot to death there.

I hope it's worth it

I'm hungry constantly.

My head has hurt for two days from caffeine withdrawal.

So I can't sleep.

And every freakin' show I've seen on TV since Friday night has mentioned food.

On the other hand, I'm really digging the little Weight Watchers interface that lets me keep track of everything I eat, down to the portion size.

Of course, that means I'm obsessing over everything I've ever eaten or am even thinking about eating.

I look it up, I add up the points, I estimate whether or not I can get through the day.

And, much like watching Food Network - or this weekend, just about anything, it seems - that just makes me think about food... and that makes me hungry.

My head hurts.

At least I don't think Advil cost me any points.

So much for Shawshank

OK, I was late for my haircut this morning (surprise!) and when I sat down to kick on a pair of shoes, I accidentally punted one across the room.

So I just sort of stuck my bare foot into whatever was there and hurried out. Wearing one sneaker (right foot) and one dress shoe (left foot).

My theory was, I'm only going from the car to the haircut place and back. And like they say in "The Shawshank Redemption,"who ever notices a man's shoes?

I'm two feet into the place where I get my hair cut and Karen, the nice lady who cuts my hair, asks me, "Do you know you're wearing two different shoes?"

Busted.

Thatquick.

And I discovered, through some manipulation of mirrors, that I've got a little thin spot (thin hair, that is) on the back of my head. Great. Guess in a few more years I'll be getting my hair cut even shorter.

Plus, I decided to seek professional help with my diet this time around (since I've gained back most of the weight I lost on my own the last couple of years). I joined Weight Watchers online.

Now I get to count points like everybody else.

The good news is, you get to fill out cool little forms with everything you eat. The bad news is, I'm already over my points limit for the day. I didn't know! I didn't even know I was going to sign up! It's not my fault!

Munkee!

I'm scared. But when little munkees look down, and all they see is munkeetummy, it's time to go on munkeediet.

So it's been a strange day, to say the least.

Insomniac survey time!

I wanted to go to sleep at least two hours ago, but I can't sleep.

So I took some quizzes. I love surveys.

Stole these from my man JP, the other half of the "Dead Hunt" Asian Invasion.

Which X-Man Are You?

You scored as Wolverine. Wolverine is a loner, and a skilled fighter. He's got the hots for Jean Grey but a better fit for him would be Storm. He doesn't like to follow orders which pisses Cyclops off. He has terrible memories from the experimentation done on him at Weapon X. Even though he doesn't show it, he loves the X-Men. Powers: Fast healing and adamantium skeleton and claws. Wolverine 85% Gambit 75% Colossus 70% Iceman 70% Emma Frost 60% Beast 60% Rogue 60% Cyclops 55% Jean Grey 50% Storm 40% Nightcrawler 40% Most Comprehensive X-Men Personality Quiz 2.0 created with QuizFarm.com

Which Action Hero Are You?

You scored as Batman, the Dark Knight. As the Dark Knight of Gotham, Batman is a vigilante who deals out his own brand of justice to the criminals and corrupt of the city. He follows his own code and is often misunderstood. He has few friends or allies, but finds comfort in his cause. Batman, the Dark Knight 83% Indiana Jones 79% James Bond, Agent 007 71% Lara Croft 71% Maximus 67% The Terminator 58% Captain Jack Sparrow 58% Neo, the "One" 58% El Zorro 50% William Wallace 46% The Amazing Spider-Man 42% Which Action Hero Would You Be? v. 2.0 created with QuizFarm.com

The funniest thing I've seen all day

Warning: May not be 100% safe to view in front of co-workers or small children, though not for the reason you'll think when it starts.

And speaking of videos, do you guys like the "Dead Hunt" trailer up above there?

Is it too big? I mean, as far as I'm concerned, it can't be too big. But you're my readers, you tell me if it gets in your way.

Everybody else is doing it...

Aric and Stewie did "best of 2006" posts, so I stole Freak's blog title and thought I'd do my own.

What can I say? I'm a lemming.


So, "with no ado whatsoever," here's my best of 2006.

(Much like the Oscars, it's going to be heavily weighted toward the end of the year... sue me.)


Best book: I'm going to go with "Dark Harvest," by Norman Partridge, from Cemetery Dance. A really terrific little horror thriller.



Best book, Civil War: "The Generals of Gettysburg," by Larry Tagg. A series of short, but thorough biographies of every brigade-level commander on up, North and South, who fought at the Civil War's signature battle.



Best CD: The "Snakes on a Plane" soundtrack. You might be able to tell if you watch the "My lousy taste in music" display below, but I'm completely addicted to Cobra Starship's "Snakes on a Plane (Bring It)" single.


Best experience: The "Dead Hunt" premiere, back in June, and the public premiere, at HorrorFind in August. That's me and my proud parents at the June show above. (Rest in peace, Don. I hope I did you proud.)



Best movie, in general: "The Descent," the follow-up to "Dog Soldiers" by Neil Marshall. Great, scary, scary movie. Best one of the year on several horror fans' lists.



Best movie, in theater: "Snakes on a Plane," which I saw the same day as "The Descent," in New York. I differentiate because "SoaP" was just an experience to be enjoyed. "Descent" is a better film. "SoaP" was more fun.


Best score: My PlayStation 3, which I got more or less by blind luck. Blu-Ray, baby! I'm in the high-def DVD wars! Score!


(Photo by Hawaiian Fire)

Best vacation: Do you really have to ask? Hawaii, baby!